AB + BS + T.
October 7th, 2009
It’s the first week.. Yes the first week.. I was pretty eager for it initially but now after being introduced to the coming workload, I am not so eager anymore.. It’s not only from my studies alone, I have other workloads like serving in Christian Fellowship and my Church.. But hey I really want to change this mindset because I believe this not what the Bible teaches. The Bible taught me that, in all things, do your best unto Jesus Christ, giving praise and thanks to the Father through my Lord Jesus Christ. This was what the Bible really teaches. It ought not to be a burden for me, it should be something that I am enjoy doing.
But I know, there is a part in the Bible also teach that we won’t be enjoying all things, in those things we enjoy, praise God, in those things that we don’t enjoy, then it is our stewardship to do our best. So yeah, I am still learning, I fall and God will pick me up again. But each fall I guess, I shouldn’t guess but I pray that at every fall, I would grow stronger in my faith towards Jesus Christ and my relationship with God than ever before. This is my prayer unto the LORD my God, please hear and answer me always O God. In Jesus Christ’s Name, amen.
It really struck me yesterday when Daniel shared about the importance of the focus of Christian Fellowship to be on God.. When talked about the focus thingy, I began to think about my own life, what have my focus really been all this while? Looking back at the past, before I came to College, I said to myself that the reason why I am going to College is because of God, because of Jesus Christ therefore I want to obey HIM in all circumstances and do what HE wants me to do.. But somehow I lost my focus in the middle of the first semester and it went out even until today or perhaps God wasn’t really my focus from the start.. It was just my emotions. It’s hard to walk the talk..
This morning while doing my daily devotion, I read the Scripture on where David relented and didn’t kill Nabul and allowing God to do HIS work which is to take vengeance on behalf of David. It was awesome because I think it somehow to spoke to me.. Not that I have a vengeance on anyone but I have some issues lately that I really don’t know what should I do.. It’s not this nor that. It sucks. But reading that Scripture, it is like God is saying, “Hey boy, chill.. Do what you are supposed to do and I will take care of the rest. Just do the right thing and honor ME.” Please forgive me, in fear of God, I am no one to put it so blatantly that God spoke to me in such manner but roughly this is the thought I had when I meditated upon that scripture. So the bottom line is, just leave it to God to do HIS work on the issue, the rest just do what I am supposed to do and trust in HIM.
Recently I was going through this thought of mine.. Perhaps it’s like what I am experiencing. Have you ever experienced deep hunger pangs and if you continue to ignore those pangs, somehow or another you don’t feel hungry anymore and feel very bloated. Worst yet, you suddenly feel like throwing up instead of filling in.. This anecdote or rather parable can be applied to a lot of things and it is somehow a reflection of the issues I am going through and the issue is AB + BS + T.
Sometimes I really felt I am trying too hard, maybe it is time for relaxing? It’s like constipation, the harder you try pushing the shit, sometimes it just won’t come out and if it do, it will definitely hurt your ass. Just let the colon do its work, when it is time, even if you are constipating, it will come out.